Here Is Why Alcohol Is Legal and Marijuana Is Not

(Part #3 of our series, Through The Eyes Of A Stoner by James Munroe)

D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse and Resistance Education )

She was slumped in the chair, completely lambasted. The nights frolicking and dancing and guzzling champagne had all but peaked and she was on the downhill now. She was fading fast. At one point she fell completely forward, with her chest in her lap, resting her head on her knee and bitching and moaning that she was so tired.

"Your head looks super comfy on your knee." I couldn't resist saying it.

Her head flops up, two burning pupils rage at me from under eyeshadow that has been running. She looks sort of like a clown, (like a cranky, rotten, drunk one.) Her lipstick's smudged up a bit and the crooked bow in her hair is holding back an army of frazzled mess. There's a strange sort of perplexed snarl on her face, as if she's wondering why she's annoyed, yet certain she has every right to be. She makes a few stuttering, mumbling noises and then does something that appears to be spitting, before resting her head back to the comfort of her knee.

It was clear to me that I was not her favorite person at this point in time.

I sit back in my chair and pan the party. I'm not a terribly big drinker, but I've got a beer in my hand for appearances sake. It's my father in laws 50TH and quite a few people have turned up to his bash. A few of they party goers, like angry clown girl across from me, seem to have had no restraint on excersicing their right to a good time and no one seems to mind that they've done so. They're not hurting anybody, just letting their hair down and having a good time right? I find it amusing in the least.

Angry clown girl moans. I don't think she's having very much fun anymore.

What's ironic to me, is that the very same girl who's too drunk to lift her face off her knees or her cigarette to her lips has looked me dead in the eye and told me that one of the reasons she doesn't agree with Cannabis, or think that it should ever be legal, is because of what it does to people.

Yup, seems legit. Her argument makes so much sense, especially in the light of the current circumstances. Alcohol has obviously transformed her into a hallmark citizen since the nights festivities began. Marijuana must make her do shamefully embarrassing things, considering that she has zero problem presenting herself in her current state to a party of her friends.

It's not really her fault though, is it? Sure, being limp vegetable drunk is something you can't really blame someone else for, but she's been born and bred into a society and a culture that embraces the use of alcohol yet abhors the weed because it's been driven into them repeatedly that drugs are bad for long enough that it has now become generally accepted as true. Drugs make you crazy. They make you do stupid things. Marijuana is a drug. It is bad. You must not do the weed. It's a very "See Spot Run" mentality. It's short and sweet, lacking depth but hoping to succeed by winning you over with pretty pictures. The sad thing is, the picture strategy seems to have worked.

The government has been spinning yarn for long enough that we've become entangled.

When big brother can pass off alcohol to the masses, by removing the label 'Drug,' and promoting it as something perfectly acceptable to be enjoyed at any time, in any place, by any responsible adult it's perfectly OK isn't it? If they can promote a drink using scantily clad women having a great time in a club and in turn promote and successfully sell the exact same product to a small family having a barbecue in the back yard then they've stumbled upon the Solomons mine of the legal drug trade. They'll slap a label on it telling people to "consume responsibly," absolving themselves of most of the blame when someone does not consume responsibly and let the money fall into their pockets.

Sure, there's a few tear jerking commercials aimed at combating the problem of driving whilst under the influence, but to be honest that's all smoke and mirrors. Running a few anti drink driving ads distracts the masses from the truest problems. The government is holding us close with one arm, giving us the appearance of a caring, concerned figure head, then reaching around with their free hand and stealing our wallets just when we think it's safe to trust.

You want to peddle a refined substance that is directly responsible for a ballpark figure of around 3 million deaths worldwide per annum yet completely outlaw a 100% natural herb, with countless healing properties that has failed to be fatal even just one recorded time, yet you expect me to trust that you are looking out for my health and best interests?

Don't piss in my pocket and tell me it's raining; I'm a stoner not the village idiot.

Let's talk liver cancer. Let's talk being on dialysis every day for the rest of your life because of consuming a fully approved government sanctioned drug. (Never forget, drugs are bad... )

Let's talk alcohol related violence. It is rampant. It spills onto the streets every night from the clubs and I watch its aftermath on the early morning news. Men and women are being hauled off nightly in paddy wagons. A brother accidentally kills his sibling in a drunken brawl; a husband puts his wife in the hospital after he has a 12 pack and she "falls down the stairs;" most people fail to pay attention to the facts of life happening all around them every single day and in some instances in their very own lives, but the very same people will soak up every word of the lies that are propogated from corrupt government spinsters.

Let's talk about getting drunk and passing out in a random place, falling and hurting yourself, or just plain making an asshole of yourself, such as angry clown girl was now, up and full of beans talking to her grandmother. I couldn't make out much of it, but I distinctly heard the words "fucking cunt and dick hole."

We can be honest about it, along with being about as healthy for you as Aids, alcohol turns people into assholes. For many people the asshole only comes out for a couple of random events, but for some it's just part of the parcel and package of being a regular heavy drinker: if you get drunk you may get diarrhea of the mouth.

Don't get me wrong here folks, I love to have a drink. I'm a fucking bartender for Christ's sake. At a party I'll be the first person popping a cold one and the last one on the dance floor. I don't have an issue with drinking, or even drinking in excess, but I have an issue with the lopsided esteems that it seems most of society holds in relation to Marijuana and Alcohol. One is lethal yet readily available while the other is not and remains largely shrouded under the hood of misinformed taboos and intentional deceit.

I have nearly killed myself driving a car drunk and then wrapping it around a light pole. I have used drunken wisdom to surmise that it wouldn't be a problem to toss a handful of powerful sedatives in my mouth after a fifth of whiskey. (I was found half naked in a field later that night, unresponsive with friends fearing I had actually died.) I have fallen down drunk, having later been taken to the E.R. where I underwent a catscan and even had stitches in my face yet remained unconscious through the whole ordeal.

Anyone with half a brain knows full well that when you hold up Alcohol and Cannabis under the same scrutiny, it does seem pretty mysterious as to why a natural healer loses the vote to something so poisonous.

Make no mistake, I believed those same lies for a long time too, but when a plant that stands for healing and liberation is demonized before a potion that births bloody violence in the streets at night it's time to stand back and adjust the scales, 'cause something is seriously out of whack.

Maybe it has something to do with pride. Maybe it has something to do with people not wanting to admit that they've been duped by something so unjustly absurd as the Marijuana prohibition. No matter the reason, or no matter whether you prefer to have a cold one or do a J, there comes a point in time where we as a people need to be honest with ourselves and admit that we have been blatantly deceived.

That's just my humble opinion though, and truthfully? Well to be honest I'd better go try and find angry clown girl, she's wandered off to the toilet and I'm worried she'll fall into the pool and drown on the way.

Peace,

James