When Prohibitionists Run out of Ideas: WTF Studies of 2017
Welcome folks to the end of prohibition, where those against the legalization of cannabis will grasp at straws hoping to sway the opinion of the weed-loving majority in society. Today’s WTF study involves “cannabis users and non-users” and the difference between them ‘walking’.
No that wasn’t a typo…WALKING!
The WTF Study that serves no purpose explained
Some of you might be sitting there wondering what the hell I am talking about. Well, let me clear that up. I read this in one of my favorite sensationalist media outlets Daily Mail, that have a long standing reputation of spewing anti-cannabis rhetoric like verbal diarrhea.
The study they were citing comes from the University of South Australia where ‘researchers’ (I use the term loosely), studied the differences in walking patterns of cannabis users and non-users.
Here’s a few quotes from their “findings” (again…used loosely)
‘The changes in walking were small enough that a neurologist specializing in movement disorders was not able to detect changes in all of the cannabis users.’ - Verity Pearson-Dennett (Study author)
Pearson-Dennett added: 'The main takeaway message is that use of cannabis can result in subtle changes in the way you move.'
According to the study a cannabis user’s knee reaches a greater speed when they walk than non-users. I assume that this could be a small genetic mutation due to the fact that we have been persecuted by law enforcement for nearly 70 years. But then again…I’m no Scientist!
Additionally, cannabis users have more flexible elbows when they walked, however their shoulders were stiffer than non-users. I don’t know what this implies or how this actually matters in the real world…but okay.
The study suggested that cannabis use is linked to a person’s gait, but also mentions that it is so insignificant that changes are not clinically detectable.
SO WTF DOES THIS ALL MEAN?
ABSOLUTELY-FUCKING-NOTHING! I have no idea how these studies actually receive funding. I mean, who’s funding these assholes anyhow? Who sat there one day and thought to themselves, “I wonder if weed makes you walk differently?”
What’s the point of the study? What are they trying to prove?
“People walk differently on weed, even though it’s not clinically significant…they do…so…weed…is…bad?”
I’m really trying to find the meaning behind this study and I’m still baffled.
Why trying to find the negatives of cannabis isn’t a bad thing necessarily
For decades now, governments around the world have been trying to find the ‘negatives’ of cannabis. In fact, the DEA and NIDA only approved studies seeking out these negative effects. For the vast majority of the studies against weed, positive data came out in favor of weed.
They tried to prove that cannabis kills brain cells by suffocating monkeys yet shortly after the study, real scientists and researchers found that it does the opposite and actually promotes neurogenesis. They tried to link cannabis to crime, only finding that alcohol is mostly responsible for violent crime. They tried and tried and tried again...yet it always seems that cannabis finds a way to prove ‘them’ wrong.
I’m not opposed to finding out the actual risk of using cannabis. Any smart consumer of any product wants to know what’s good about the product they are using, what’s bad and so forth. This is being informed. However, creating studies for the sake of creating negative stigma surrounding a beneficial plant is just a waste of time and money.
We have had nearly 70 years of negative cannabis research and despite decades long scrutiny on the plant…it’s still considered one of the safest drugs on the planet.
We also need to address that “safest drug on the planet” does not indicate it’s harmless. For instance, smoke is not good for the human organism. This is a fact. Thus, there is some harm being done when you smoke joints, pipes or bongs. Nonetheless, researchers found the impact on the lungs to be minimal and usually goes away entirely when the user stops smoking for a while. Furthermore, modern vaping devices have eliminated this factor.
See…when you know something is ‘harmful’ then you can take measures to diminish the harms. Case and point – Smoking vs Vaping.
It’s not bad to look for the negatives in cannabis…it helps us as consumers be more responsible with our consumption. However, pulling facts out of your ass and presenting bogus studies like the one from Australia is asinine to say the least.
You know Prohibition is ending when…
Prohibition is going the way of the dodo and studies like the one I mentioned above is proving this hypothesis to me. It means that those within the prohibition camp are becoming desperate and grasping for straws as the river of change sucks them in.
Do you guys know of any more WTF studies out there? Send them to me so I can research it and scorn it with delight.
I thought to help illustrate the way stoners walk…this video might provide some insight https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=74&v=wBqM2ytqHY4
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