Emergency stoner snacks
Emergency stoner snacks

Emergency Stoner Snacks - You're High, Can't Drive, No DoorDash or Delivery, What Do You Do?

What are the best snacks to have on hand when you get high?

Posted by:
Reginald Reefer on Friday Apr 5, 2024

best stoner emergency snacks

Emergency Stoner Snacks


Picture this: it's the middle of the night, and you've just indulged in a delightful session with your favorite herbal companion. Suddenly, out of nowhere, it hits you like a ton of bricks – the munchies. This insatiable hunger, a well-known side effect of marijuana consumption, can strike at any moment, leaving you with an overwhelming desire to devour everything in sight.


For stoners, the munchies are both a curse and a blessing. On one hand, food simply tastes better when you're high. Flavors are enhanced, textures are more satisfying, and even the most mundane snacks can feel like a gourmet feast. It's a sensory experience that elevates the joy of eating to new heights. On the other hand, when the munchies hit hard, they can create some challenges.


You see, when you're deep in the throes of a munchies attack, decision-making skills aren't exactly at their peak. Stoners often find themselves staring blankly into the fridge or pantry, overwhelmed by the endless possibilities and unable to choose what to eat. The struggle is real, folks. Do you go for something sweet or savory? Crunchy or chewy? The options are limitless, and the indecision can be paralyzing.


But fear not, my fellow stoners, for we have a solution to your munchies woes. In this article, we'll be sharing some emergency stoner snacks that are quick, easy, and satisfying. These recipes are designed for those moments when you need something to munch on ASAP, without requiring too much brain power or culinary skill.


So Sit back, roll yourself one, and let’s get into it.


The Sleezy Jeff: The Sloppy Joe's Lesser-Known Cousin


Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to the Sleezy Jeff – the not-so-popular cousin of the beloved Sloppy Joe. While the Sloppy Joe is a classic, the Sleezy Jeff is the unsung hero of the stoner snack world. It's the go-to choice when you're high, hungry, and in need of something quick and satisfying.


At its core, the Sleezy Jeff is a simple creation. It consists of two slices of bread, some cold cuts, a slice or two of cheese, and a quick trip to the microwave for 30 seconds. That's it. No frills, no fuss, just pure, unadulterated munchies satisfaction. It's the Sleezy Jeff in its rawest, most basic form.


But here's where things get interesting. The beauty of the Sleezy Jeff lies in its versatility. Depending on what you have lurking in your fridge, you can elevate this humble snack to new heights. Enter the Sleezy Jeff Supreme – a glorious upgrade that will make your taste buds sing.


To create a Sleezy Jeff Supreme, start by spreading some cream cheese on your bread. Then, layer on some ham and top it off with a slice of yellow cheese. Pop it in the microwave for that signature Sleezy Jeff warmth, and then let your creativity run wild. Got some avocado? Slice it up and add it on top. Tomato? Why not? The more, the merrier.


Now, some might argue that the Sleezy Jeff is just a fancy name for a sandwich. But oh, how wrong they would be. The Sleezy Jeff is the Frankenstein's monster of the sandwich world. It's a beautiful amalgamation of whatever your heart desires and whatever your fridge has to offer. There are no rules, no limitations – just pure, unbridled culinary experimentation.


So the next time the munchies strike and you find yourself in need of a quick fix, remember the Sleezy Jeff. It may not be the prettiest snack on the block, but it's a faithful friend that will never let you down. Embrace the chaos, let your creativity flow, and savor every messy, delicious bite of this stoner staple.


Long live the Sleezy Jeff!


Taquitos Supreme: Elevating the Frozen Food Game


Next up on our list of emergency stoner snacks for the magic munchies are the Taquitos Supreme. These delightful little rolled-up tortillas filled with savory goodness can be found in the frozen food section of any grocery store. They're a staple in many a stoner's freezer, and for good reason.


Now, some people might be content with simply popping these taquitos in the microwave and calling it a day. But let's be real – that's not how a true stoner rolls (pun intended). To create the ultimate Taquitos Supreme, we're going to take things to the next level.


First, grab your desired number of taquitos and heat up some oil in a pan. Once the oil is hot, place the taquitos in the pan and let them brown and crisp up on all sides. Here's a pro tip: have a lid ready to cover the pan and steam the taquitos simultaneously. This little trick will ensure that they're crispy on the outside and perfectly heated on the inside. Give them about 5-10 minutes to reach golden perfection.


Next, it's time to add some flavor. Grab some soy sauce or any other sauce that tickles your fancy and would pair well with these taquitos. Gently drizzle the sauce over the top of the taquitos, making sure each one gets a nice coating.


Now, here comes the best part – the cheese. Sprinkle a generous amount of shredded cheese over the top of the taquitos. You can use whatever cheese you have on hand, but we recommend something that melts nicely, like cheddar or monterey jack. Pop the whole pan into the microwave for about 30 seconds, or until the cheese is melted and bubbly.


Finally, grab some additional sauce for dipping (because let's face it, you can never have too much sauce), find a cozy spot, and prepare to indulge in your Taquitos Supreme creation. The combination of crispy tortillas, savory filling, melted cheese, and flavorful sauce is sure to satisfy even the most intense munchies.


The best part? This entire process takes only about 12 minutes from start to finish. It's a quick and easy way to quench the munchie monster without resorting to anything too unhealthy. Sure, it's not exactly a superfood, but compared to some other late-night snack options, the Taquitos Supreme is practically a gourmet meal. Plus, it tastes absolutely delicious, and isn't that what really matters when you're high and hungry?


So the next time you find yourself with a freezer full of taquitos and a serious case of the munchies, remember the Taquitos Supreme. Your taste buds (and your stoner soul) will thank you.



The Peanut Butter Snack Witch: A Sweet and Addictive Munchie Treat


Attention all stoners with a sweet tooth! Allow me to introduce you to the Peanut Butter Snack Witch – a delightful creation that will satisfy your cravings and leave you craving more. Now, technically, this recipe calls for a snackwich maker, one of those nifty devices that press bread together and toast it to perfection. But fear not, my resourceful friends, a waffle maker or any other type of press will work just as well.


If you don't have any of these devices on hand, don't worry. You can still join in on the Snack Witch fun. Simply start by toasting your bread on both sides until it reaches your desired level of crispiness. This extra step will ensure that your Snack Witch has a sturdy foundation to build upon.


Now, here's where the magic happens. Take one slice of your toasted bread and spread a generous amount of peanut butter on it. On the other slice, slather on some jelly – whatever flavor your heart desires. Strawberry, grape, raspberry, the possibilities are endless. Once your bread is sufficiently coated in this heavenly combination, pop it into your snackwich maker or press and let it work its magic.


As your Snack Witch cooks, the aroma of warm peanut butter and sweet jelly will fill the air, making your mouth water in anticipation. After a few moments of delicious torture, your creation will be ready. Carefully remove it from the maker and behold the glory of the Peanut Butter Snack Witch.


Take a moment to admire its golden-brown exterior, the way the peanut butter and jelly ooze out ever so slightly from the edges. Then, sink your teeth into this sweet and savory masterpiece. The combination of crispy bread, creamy peanut butter, and fruity jelly is nothing short of addictive. Don't be surprised if you find yourself going back for seconds, thirds, or even fourths. It's just that good.


But wait, there's more! The beauty of the Peanut Butter Snack Witch lies in its versatility. Once you've mastered the basic recipe, it's time to get creative. Try adding a layer of Nutella for an extra dose of chocolatey goodness. Sprinkle in some chocolate bits for a delightful crunch. If you're feeling particularly indulgent, add a few marshmallows or a smear of cream cheese. The possibilities are endless, and the only limit is your imagination (and perhaps the contents of your pantry).


So the next time the munchies strike and your sweet tooth is calling, remember the Peanut Butter Snack Witch. It's a quick, easy, and insanely delicious way to satisfy your cravings. Just be warned – once you've had a taste of this magical munchie treat, there's no going back. Your taste buds will be forever enchanted by the Snack Witch's spell.


The Sticky Bottom Line


If you’re hungry and need a snack idea…I think these would make insanely good munchies. We have to be resourceful when we’re “in the thick of it”. If you enjoyed these and perhaps want to know some healthier alternatives, let me know in the comments and I may write about it in the future.


Until then, happy snacking!





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