Some Of My Funniest Medical Marijuana Delivery Stories
You may think that delivering medical marijuana for patients around California might be boring, dull or uneventful, but I can tell you that you’d be very wrong thinking that. I’ve been doing this job for a couple of years now, and some of the stories I have could make most readers blush. Read on whilst I recount some of the more cringe worthy but funny incidents that I have experienced on my travels. With the diverse range of customers that we have who order from us frequently, episodes like this happen more frequently than you could probably imagine.
Sometimes when you’re delivering pot late at night, you come across all kinds of unusual people. I had needed to park my vehicle a little further away than usual, as there were a good few cars parked up. I delivered an order to a customer who is a frequent customer but after getting back towards my car, I noticed a man standing beside my vehicle on the passenger side. I was trying to work out what he was doing, when I noticed he was leaning against the car, as though he was drunk. When I got to the driver’s side, I asked him if he was ok, and he called out an address at me. Puzzled, I asked him what he meant and he started trying to open the passenger door to get in. Then it dawned on me. This guy had drunk so much that he thought I was a taxi driver. It took me a little while to explain to him that I was a delivery driver and couldn’t take him to his destination. I called him a cab in the end and made sure he got in safely. That was certainly quite an experience.
Sometimes, medical marijuana customers are not as grown up as they should be. I once took a marijuana order to a home to have the door answered by a woman in her early 20s. As she opened the door, she smiled slyly at me, turned around and shouted “hey sis, your boyfriend’s here should I let him in?” to which another woman, maybe a couple of years younger than her came running down the stairs wearing panties and a shirt and a big grin on her face. As she got about half way down the stairs she saw me and her face dropped in horror. The woman who had answered the door laughed her head off, so much that she could barely form understandable words as she tipped me $5 dollars. I felt bad for her sister. It was pretty awkward.
I was driving to my next delivery of the day, when suddenly through my rear window, I noticed I was being followed by a police car. Well I couldn’t quite tell if I was being followed, or if he was simply driving behind me, but I saw the cop and began to sweat a little. I know that I’m only doing my job, but these situations can get really concerning. That’s when the cop put on the sirens and the lights to pull me over. It was a hot day anyway, but I knew how much marijuana I had in my vehicle and I’d remembered that I’d left my employee ID at work. I was signaled to roll down my windshield and the cop said that I had a light out. I told him I knew about it and that I’d noticed it earlier in the night. Then he sniffed in deeply and said “son, have you got any marijuana in your vehicle?”. I said that I had and I had to of course show him. He took one look at the package that I was carrying and from the look on his face, I thought he was about to take me in for questioning, but instead, he suddenly smirked and looked me in the eye and said “I don’t suppose I could get a business card, man?”. It turned out that he had PTSD and his doctor had given him a medical card just 2 weeks before. I felt lucky as I really should have had my ID on me at the time. The cop didn’t seem to mind, and accepted the parcel and address as proof that I was indeed doing what I claimed to be doing.
Written by Zack, at PotValet, a delivery service in California.